How many of us have grown up with absent fathers, on some level? Whether it be physically, emotionally or spiritually? How many of us women have been cheated on, witnessed our mothers being cheated on, disrespected or even physically/emotionally abused? Yep I fall into this category, much like many others. Both men & women.
As a women's sexuality coach & fellow human, on this journey. One of the greatest core wounds I see in others, and personally face & thus tends to be one of the biggest roadblock on my opening to love is, mistrust, and betrayal. Given the above experiences & situations, how the fuck are we meant to trust a man? No wonder so many of us shut down sexually, the amount of trauma we associate with the untrustworthy masculine, leaves us pretty weary, on physical, emotional, and sub conscious levels.
I am speaking loosely in the terms of man and woman. More to the point, I refer to masculine and feminine energy, which resides in both man and woman. So yes of course men cannot trust the masculine energy in a woman, if she has an unhealthy untrustworthy shady masculine energy inside her.
We can also not trust the feminine energy. But for today's explorations we are focusing on masculine, because it feels most relevant for me right now personally & collectively.
Betrayal is the core wound of the feminine. Mistrust of the masculine, of the sisterhood, of our parents. How is the feminine meant to open if she constantly feels unsafe to do so? Where in ourselves do we give our power away to story & past pain.
We all hold this core wound whether we are aware of it or not. From the moment of birth we feel betrayal by God , as we enter this physical realm of life of suffering & soul lessons. Then our mother & father become our version of God/goddess & eventually let us down in some way. This then builds the foundation for how we trust in men & women in our lives. How do we ever trust again? So we can open fully to love ? Betrayal is so deep it sometimes seems so difficult to see any chance of trusting again.
THE JOURNEY TO TRUSTING AGAIN...
So with all this deep trauma, which begins from the point of conception, how do we ever trust again? Ahhh, welcome to the human experience. In my own personal experience, either with the support of someone holding a neutral non judgmental space (either coach or a friend), tapping into & releasing all the fucking rage is a start, purifying the entire physical, emotional & energetic body; through that scream of "where the fuck were you to protect me?" Releasing all the anger towards those who have betrayed us, our fathers, our mothers, our ex partners, God...
Then dropping into the deep sadness beneath this..... Beyond the Rage is always a deep sadness, a longing to connect to love again. Dropping deeper & deeper until we can finally come to a place of compassion - as fucking hard as that is (believe me, I know)... For self & the other.
Realizing we all screw up & we all have shadows - the more we are actually honest with ourselves, employing complete transparency & authenticity... even in the name of losing it all ------- The trust slowly rebuilds.
We begin to trust ourselves, at the core. For when we are honest with how we feel, we trust ourselves, and therefore we begin to slowly trust others. Deep mistrust of others often reflects the mistrust of our selves, that we cannot find our way back to love, even if someone does betray us. We are always love and loved, no matter who may throw sticks and stones at us...
May we have compassion & begin to love all aspects of ourselves & rebuild our trust, in love, in God/Goddess, in our parents, in our ex partners & in existence itself.
Wish to Dive Deeper?
Join Rosie Rees & Myself for the Embodying your Feminessence One Day Retreat, in Perth; for a day of deep authentic sisterhood, as we gather & journey with all aspects of the feminine, releasing all old patterns, stories & mistrust; through Tantric Embodiment Practices, Soul Nourishing Processes, Sisterhood support. To open to trust, surrender, sensuality & feminine radiance. CLICK HERE FOR INFO & BOOKINGS.